Rabbi Esther Azar MSW
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Repeating History

7/8/2010

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One of the greatest things about raising children is that they bring out all of our issues to work on, all of the things that we thought we grew out of.  What amazes me, is that we repeat history. Family dynamic is pretty amazing. No matter what, if we are not aware, we as parents, together with the children, will recreate the same dynamics that our parents created. With my children, I see myself withholding love from them. I have a difficult time sitting on the floor playing with them, ironic considering the fact that I am a play therapist. I think  this must come from my childhood where I got the feeling that I was annoying to be around so I automatically place this on them. My sweet innocent children who are not annoying in any way become something else through the eyes of my childhood. Now I want you to understand something;   people tell me all the time that I am a pretty good mother but what I am saying to you is that even good mothers recreate bad situations if we are not aware of past patterns and family dynamics. If you looked from the outside you would say, “Wow, she is doing a good job!”  Looking deeper and fine tuning helps me to grow and helps my children. It makes me even better. Considering that they’re only 3 and 7, you’ll have to let me know in a couple of years how I did.
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esther@estherazar.com
www.traumainformedrabbinics.org
  • My Path
    • The Toolbox
  • Blogs
    • Rereading Torah
    • In My Experience...
    • Teachings
  • tIR
    • Trauma Informed Rabbinics
  • Services
  • Artwork
  • Meditations
    • Release The Balloon
    • Election Eve: Growing a Seed of Justice